What Was Revealed – 100 Day practice
This isn’t the most powerful question in the world –
Is today a good day to die?
This is –
Is today a good day for Suzanne to die?
Holy Poop! If I have any doubt about the nature of life and death, this question will flush it out. If I have any doubt who my wife, Suzanne, truly is, this question will slap me awake.
A Refresher –
My friend and colleague, Kim Ivy challenged me and her students with maintaining a practice for 100 days. It’s a traditional Taoist idea.
I took it on.
My Practice
My practice was to show up every morning at the beach on Lake Washington or on the Salish Sea, practice Taiji (Tai Chi) or something similar in order to be present enough to be able to say wholeheartedly, “Today is a good day to die!”
In order to be able to say that wholeheartedly, you have to be present. No mind chatter. The grasping, clinging ego never thinks it’s a good day to die. When you’re present, the ego is gone. You are free to say, “Today is a good day to die!”
My beloved Zen teacher, Genjo, said, “That’s all well and good William, but how about a good day for Suzanne to die?
“#@$%** you and the horse you came in on,” I said.
Genjo just laughed, of course.
I found this second question – Is today a good day for Suzanne to die? – most revealing. If you ask my ego, there is never a good day for Suzanne to die.
You may have guessed that someday it will be the day that Suzanne dies. I may be lucky enough to be there. We have been married for nearly four decades. We’re likely to be married until death do us part. So this practice has a point to it, doesn’t it.
In order to say – Today is a good day for Suzanne to die -- wholeheartedly, I have to be deeply present. I have to know who she is at the deepest levels.
I showed up every day for the 100 days just like the US mail – through rain, wind, cold. Some days were a tad sloppy, others fully transcendent as you might expect.
One day slipped my mind completely due to a change in routine.
The Surprises I Discovered
At some point, moving through my morning forms, I would open to the vast magic of life unfolding in the present moment, and I would find Suzanne right there, in the infinite moment.
One day she was in the curvature of the earth. Another in the Lombardy poplar, another in the cherry blossoms. Each day she appeared. Each day she appeared in a different guise. Obviously on each day, I could say, “Today is a good day for Suzanne to die.”
Blessings,
William
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